Friday, March 06, 2009

My NGO (actually, make that QuANGO)

I have decided to form a new NGO dedicated to a cause dear to my heart. I shall call it The Society for the Promotion of Beards and the Prevention When you grow a beard like this, you can get away with the douchiest of capsof Shaving.

For too long, my brothers*, we have been in thrall of a pernicious fashion that forces us to deny the truth of our hairy visages. For too long, we have bowed to the power of the Razor regime, the evil Gillette empire that seeks to enslave us in order to secure a permanent market for their infernal blades. (Incidentally, did you know that King Camp Gillette was a Socialist?) Too long have we denied our masculine instincts at the behest of dweeby pretty-boy celebrities and bogus claims of high technology. Far too long have we participated in a bogus tradition designed to avoid beardless sissy Alexander the Great undue embarrassment from comparison to real men.

Enough, I say. No more. Cast off your chains and throw away your razors. Follow the inspiring example of Joseph Palmer, and defy you smooth-cheeked persecutors. Obey the precepts of Leviticus, Mohamed (p.b.u.h.) and Guru Gobind Singh. Rebel against the Man, that clean-shaven bastard. Be different. There are many, many reasons to grow your beard. Embrace one of them. Stop shaving. Join me, and be what you were meant to be.

[* I do not mean to be sexist, I'm just going by probabilities here. Any woman who can meet our entry requirements is welcome to join our Society.]

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5 Comments:

Blogger Shriniwas K said...

Well glad you joined the Moustache Brigade (www.ata.org and www.tana.org) with your beard brigade. I guess saving few dollars every week on shaving supplies inspires pathbreaking ideas like your NGO and a lot more!

Watch that episode of Dexter's Laboratory: Beard to be Feared :)

3:08 PM  
Blogger Kunal said...

Umm, why did I join the moustache brigade? Also, please refrain from ascribing base pecuniary motives to our noble endeavour.

11:27 PM  
Blogger Hawkeye said...

Dude - Of all people, if economists start promoting non-economic activities like bearding (opposite of shaving) - Barack "Hope" Obama is going to be really really pissed!! And you know how capitalist captain america will kick your socialist ass if you get in the way of "Change"

11:59 PM  
Blogger Kunal said...

I am curious, why is growing a beard non-economic?

9:37 AM  
Blogger workhard said...

Hmm, i dont think that women are going to take this in a very positive note.

Haiku Poems

10:07 AM  

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